[BBC News] Network Rail says “All bets off for £38bn rail plan”
[WTF] So… we’re going to spend £50 billion on getting from London to Birmingham 20 minutes faster, instead of £38 billion to bring pretty much every other line and station in the country out of the golden age of steam? Tell y’what, if you throw in a high-speed line from Heathrow to Gatwick as a technology tester you can keep the change.
[WTF] Mental note: When attempting to induce consciousness round about 11AM on one of those days using levels of caffeine that would give a rhino double vision via the medium of Vietnamese coffee, take special care when reaching into the fridge not to mix up the tubes of condensed milk and garlic paste.
[UPS Guy] Just sign there, sir.
[WTF] Does it never bother you that you deliver delicate packages for a company most easily pronounced as “oops”?
[WTF] Bought a Dell B1165nfw printer. It’s a fast laser, got a document scanner with a sheet feeder, inbuilt fax, WiFi, Airprint, and photocopier.
[Bloke] Really? Sounds great. What does the “nfw” bit mean?
[WTF] Never fucking works.
[WTF] If I ever find the bugger who convinced me that Minnie Driver had an older sister called Laurie, I swear I’m gonna…
[WTF] The only infinite resource humanity possesses is the sheer ingenuity of idiots.
[NY Times] Yield-hungry investors stung in Greece
[WTF] Aye. Beware Greeks bearing gilts.
[WTF] “Gloriously”, it would appear, is not an acceptable answer to “Does my bum look big in this”.
[WTF] Dear Sasha, many thanks for the lovely Christmas card. Happily, the laboratory results confirmed that the small pile of white powder that fell out the envelope was in fact powdered glitter and not, as we had suspected, anthrax spores, so we may still be home in time for the big day. Seasons greetings.
[WTF] New product idea: Catnip-scented dog shampoo. Use liberally, wait for the cat to grace you with his presence, stand well back.
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